POTTY TRAINING DAY 1

CAUTION: This is a stinky tale...

I had a free day on Tuesday, no where to go, no one to see, so I decided that I would just potty train Kendyll, real quick, and get it over with. I asked her if she was ready to be a big girl, wear unders and go peeps in the potty. She said "no way" I said "yes way" and we began.


I pulled out my trusty copy of "Once upon a Potty" and read it to her. She of course loved it especially the pictures of the "stinkies" and looked at it over and over again as she sat on her Elmo seat on the big girl potty. (As a side note, I want to say that I do not believe in the portable potty training pottys, that are super fun for the kids, but super gross for mom to clean out, so we use the big potty, with a kid seat, it makes for much less of a mess.) Finally we heard the sweet sound of tinkling and the goal was accomplished. The trick now was to get her to put on the unders.. which she had no intention of doing. Either we are way too uptight around here or Kendyll is a nudist in the making, because most kids are really excited about the princess underwear, not Kendyll she said "no unders" and ran around naked for the next two hours.
Then suprisingly enough, without any coaxing or asking from me, she returned to her throne and yes, tinkled again, all my herself. I was amazed, and sure that the day was going to go just how I had planned. I finally got her to put the princess unders, with the promise of a photo shoot (the results of which you are fortunate enough to view) and we were up and running.

By noon, I was sure we had it mastered and turned my focus a bit to the things I needed to get done around the house, kind of forgetting that we had not yet encountered the blessed bm, yes bowel movement. Finally it came, and of course, ended up in the unders. So we cleaned it up and we had a long talk about how stinkies don't belong in unders. I figured I then had another good two hours before I needed to worry about it again. But low and behold twenty minutes later Kendyll came to me with her unders in her hands, pointing to the stinkies she had made on the floor. She knew they didn't belong in unders so she took them off, and yes went right on the floor. gross.

So once again we pulled out the once upon a potty book and talked about stinkies belonging, not in our unders, and not on the floor but in the potty. I quizzed her and it seemed she had it down. Well apparently Kendyll was developing a bit of the runs that day because not more than twenty minutes later there were more stinkies, not solid stinkies, but runny green stinkies. So the unders came off, were thrown in the garbage (another thing about potty training I do not believe in is washing really bad accidents out in the toilet, I think it comes from the bad memories I have of my mother making me wash my own unders out when I was potty training. I have been damaged for life. Therefore underwear in my house can be and is disposable.) and the diaper went back on and once again when I ask Kendyll if she is ready for big girl unders she says "No Way" I think maybe this time I will listen to her!

All this stinky talk however reminded me of the Poopie List- I know it is gross but face it we can all relate.

THE POOPIE LISTBathroom Humor at its finest:
Ghost Poopie
The kind where you feel the poopie come out, but there is no poopie in the toilet.
Clean Poopie
The kind where you poopie it out, see it in the toilet, but there is nothing on the toilet paper.
Wet Poopie
The kind where you wipe your bum 50 times and it still feels unwiped, so you have to put some toilet paper between your butt and underwear so you won't ruin them with a stain.
Second Wave Poopie
This happens when you're done Poopie-ing and you've pulled up your pants to your knees, and you realize that you have to Poopie some more.
Pop-A-Vein-In-Your-Forehead-Poopie
The kind where you strain so much to get it out, you practically have a stroke.
Gassy Poopie
It's so noisy, everyone within earshot is laughing.
Lincoln Log Poopie
The kind of Poopie that is so huge you're afraid to flush without first breaking it into little pieces with the toilet brush.
Corn Poopie
Self-explanatory.
Gee-I-Wish-I-Could-Poopie Poopie
The kind where you want to Poopie but all you do is sit on the toilet and bucksnort a few times.
Spinal Tap Poopie
That's where it hurts so badly coming out, you would swear it was leaving you sideways.
Wet Cheeks Poopie (The Power Dump)
The kind that comes out of your bum so fast, your bum gets splashed with water.
Mexican Poopie
It smells so bad your nose burns.
The Surprise Poopie
You're not even at the toilet because you are sure you're about to bucksnort, but oops.......a Poopie!!!
The Dangling Poopie
This Poopie refuses to drop into the toilet even though you know you are done Poopie-ing it. You just pray that a shake or two will cut it loose.

Sorry- I hope you weren't eating.